Lofty Glances From Lofty People

A couple days ago, I watched this music video by Casting Crowns. It literally made me cry. It's called "Does Anybody Hear Her" . . . and I felt like "Her" was me, about a year ago. Take a minute to watch it:

She's shunned at home, by her father. She's looking everywhere else, for that lack of fulfillment. She hurts herself in the process, as she's finding love in all the wrong places. When she goes to church, weak and defeated, she's met with "lofty glances from lofty people." No one reached out to her. The whispers all around her seem so hypocritical, as she's only looking for help, and she's heard that it is the place to find rest.

The description above fit me perfectly.

I was shunned at home, by my father. I looked everywhere else, for that lack of fulfillment. I hurt myself in the process, because I found love in all the wrong places. When I went to church, weak and defeated, I was met with "lofty glances from lofty people." No one reached out to me. The whispers all around me seemed so hypocritical, because I was looking for help, and I heard that church was the place to find rest.

If I could speak, and be heard, by the modern american church . . . I would say this.

Christianity is not about the institution.

It's about the heart.

The entire Bible testifies to this, but specifically, the book of 1 John. I've been taking time to really study chapters 3 and 4, which focus on the heart of Christianity - God's love.

1 John 3:16 - By this we know love, because he laid down his life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.

All those who profess to be Christians know of the sacrifice made for our sins. A perfect and holy God loves us enough to send his son to die in our place. Christ experienced God's wrath so we wouldn't have to. This is love! So, to the modern church . . . Is it that hard to reach out to those who are suffering? It's not like you're being asked to die on a cross or anything. Don't you realize the love you've been given? The same love that you preach about, every Sunday?

It's safe to say that all of us fail to walk the talk. We're all hypocrites in some sense, if we're being perfectly honest with ourselves. But to preach love, and yet - not show love, is shaking a fist in the face of our Father above.

1 John 3:18 - My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.

It's really tough to be judged. It really hurts, too. Because I've been there, I can say that. Sometimes, I don't even think we realize how judgemental we are of others until we feel judged ourselves. When we hear the pastor preach on love, and then walk through the church to hear whispers and see cold looks . . . Something's terribly wrong.

1 John 4: 7-8 - Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God, and everyone who loves is born of God and knows god. He who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

I guess I just don't understand. When one loves Christ, really really loves Him, there should be an overflowing gratitude and passion to love others. Am I wrong for wondering what the problem is? How can those who refuse to walk in love, really walk with God? The Bible says it's not possible.

I will probably get in trouble with the church for writing this post. However, I don't write this in arrogance . . . I do write it in love, in high hopes that they will change their ways, for the sake of their fellow believers. I plead with the church not to take this the wrong way, as they did in my last one. I love the body of Christ. I hope the expression of my bleeding heart will be met in humility.

~Lauren Lee

P.S. . . . Here's a scary verse, I think all believers need to remember this!

Matthew 27: 41-45:

Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into the eternal fire which is prepared for the devil and his angels: ⁴²for I was hungry, and ye did not give me to eat; I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink; ⁴³I was a stranger, and ye took me not in; naked, and ye clothed me not; sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not. ⁴⁴Then shall they also answer, saying, Lord, when saw we thee hungry, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee? ⁴⁵Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, as ye did it not unto one of the least of these, ye did it not unto me.

I've gone head over heels . . . It's L.O.V.E. . .

I am in love.

That tingly sensation in the pit of your stomach that makes you want to shout it to the world? Yes. The beating of my heart when I hear his name? Yes. That wonderful and blessed plague of never being able to stop thinking about him?? Yes! The ache my heart gets when I'm away from him, even for a short time?? Yes!

Now, I have not found my dream boy. I've not yet come across the handsome tall stranger who will one day be my husband. ;) BUT. I'm so in love! I am anamored with my heavenly prince, Jesus Christ. This is what Christianity is all about. It's not about rules - it's not about laws - it's not about legalism or judgemental thinking or religion or conventional wisdom. It's about Christ. It's about having a beautiful, personal, intimate relationship with him who LOVES YOU!

Am I excited much?!

Yes!!

The Lord has been putting on my heart lately that he doesn't just want to be PART of my life . . . he wants to BE my life. Every waking moment, I should be completely enraptured with Him. Not because I have to, not because rules tell me to, but because I want to. Because He loves me.

Think of an earthly relationship you might have been in. Do you love the person because your forced to? You love your mother, best friend, brother, father, husband, sister, boyfriend, whichever, not with a love that is forced . . . . but a love that springs from within. This is how it is with Christ. I don't love him because I have to - because religion tells me to. I love him because he first loved me. He is everything, my life, my love, my all in all, and I am overflowing and overjoyed to think of it.

Because of this amazing love He has for me and I have for him in return, I am so willing to give up this world. Any books, any music, any magazines, anything, that takes me away from HIM, be gone. That would be really hard for me, if I didn't have Christ as my motivation.

You all don't know my secret addiction to secular music. ;)

It's really quite awful. But if there is something in your life you can't live without, it's an idol.

"Do not love the world or the things int he world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father but is of the world." ~1 john 2:15-16

Leslie Ludy put it this way . . . "Does God stand up and cheer over american Idol? Does he smile with delight over the new Harry Potter movie? Does he get excited about the latest coldplay album?"

Probably not, huh?

I can't picture Jesus taking the night off and relaxing with a bubble bath, Jay Sean on the radio, and eating twinkies. Can you?

I'm not saying that all these are a bad thing . . . I really really love bubble baths. I can see how this can be taken as legalistic. But a true love for the Lord will weed out pop culture, so that the devil can gain no access to our souls.

Remember, the devil is crafty and decietful. We think, "oh it's ok if I watch this or listen to this. After all, I don't agree with it . . . " You're giving the devil a foothold, even if it's not consiously.

Another thing to think about along these lines - we are the temple of God. Our bodies are were the holy spirit dwells. Think about the music you're pumping into his holy dwelling. Think about the images you're recieving into his presence. His very presence!

Horrified yet?

Be scared!

In the old testimate, when a high preist would go into the temple, he walked in with a rope tied around his waist. why? In case a sinful thought crossed his mind while in the presence of God. He would be struck dead. And someone would have to pull him out. Think of the seriousness the temple was treated with in the Old Testiment . . . . and think about the defilement we put it through, in modern times.

"For you are the temple of the living God. As God has said, "I will dwell in them and walk among them. I will be their God, and they shall be My people. Therefore come out from among them and be seperate" says the Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, and I will recieve you. ~2 Corinthians 6: 16-17

Wow.

Give it all up. Love the Lord your God with everything in you. Live a life that is utterly engulfed in him. Every waking moment. Sound like a challenge? Remember: Matthew 7:14. Narrow is the way that leads to eternal life.

This is not a joy ride - it's a poured out existence for our savior!

John Piper once said that at an early age, as he was contemplating ministry, he decided to "live as he would have wished he had, once in heaven."

Yes, believe it or not, you can live without Jay Sean.

Instead of Lady Gaga, try spending time in the presence of Christ. Your love. Your life. Your everything. Let your heart pound in excitement as you prepare to meet him in quiet time . . . . be completely swept away by your heavenly prince.

This past week, I've given it up. This next week, I give it up. And the week after that. I long to be a pure and undefiled temple of God, and a beautiful bride of Christ.

You will be amazed at his love, and the intimacy of a relationship with him. Take time for your Prince, cleanse the temple.

Join me?

~Lauren Lee

Depart! Depart! Go our from there. Touch no unclean thing. Go out from the midst of her, be clean, you who bear the vessels of the Lord ~Isaiah 52:11

Dear Best Friends . . .

My best friends live way too far away. Ohio, Pennslvania, Maryland, Iowa, Minnesota, Tennesee, Nevada, South Carolina, Alabama, Indiana . . . and I'm stuck here in California. But about a month ago, I was able to see all of them at a reunion in Lancaster, PA. :) So this blog post is devoted to you guys.

These are the friends who hugged me every time they saw me, made me laugh 'til my sides hurt, were there for me when I was in tears, the ones I knew were there through thick and thin.

You all are the ones I can tell everything to, turn to for anything, and know that there are kids who love me dearly. As my beautiful friend Emilyann says, "it's like having the best support group in the world."

Nico, Justin, Wilbur, Daniel, Myles, You guys were so funny. I mean, you had to be - after all, you made James smile! ;) But thanks for bringing so much fun to the gathering, I'll NEVER forget the laughter we all shared that week.

It's so hard that all of us live so far apart . . . But our friendships are the strongest that we've ever had. The heart grows fonder when it's apart from those it loves, and we all love each other a ton.

Nico loved my sunglasses. :P

Haha. Anyway. For me, ya'll are way more then friends just to have fun with. It's something much deeper than that.

It's about walking with your sisters in Christ, there to support and inspire each other. Girls you have been such an inspiration to me. :)

Elizabeth, Lauren, Valentine and Amanda, it was so amazing getting to know you both better. I miss you!

Ryan, well . . . What can I say? Besides the fact that I love you? That pretty much sums it up. ;)

And to my Emilies - Emilyann and Emily C., my best friends, my soul sisters, I'll never forget those little moments we had together that were so amazingly special. Counting down the days till I see you girls again.

Em, being in classes with you for four years, and getting to see you only a few times, never takes away from the friendship we have. It probably even makes it stronger. I'd love to see you EVERY DAY, bestie. But, a few days a year I guess will have to do. Come back next year. I miss you, girlie.

It's also great being around brothers in Christ who have your back - who'll step in if they see a problem. Respectful, fun, amazing young men who are such an encouragement and joy.

Wilbur and Myles - my own special J brothers ;) We seem to have more inside jokes then the entire school combined. You guys are amazing. (Wilbur you'll be more amazing when you COME BACK to Myles and me in two weeks ;) )

Next year . . . We're going to rock that talent show (maybe). :p Miss you guys, so much.

Oh and Nico.

You made my week. ;) Seeing how fun you were all year, and finally getting to meet you, was really great. You have one of the spunkiest personalities out there and I had a blast, getting to know you. Can't wait to see you next year!

We all share a bond that's so, so special. And I love each and every one of you. So thank you, for being my best friends. =) Leaving ya'll was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Everyone of you are still in my thoughts and prayers!

337 DAYS TILL WE SEE EACH OTHER AGAIN! Whoo hoo!

~Lauren Lee

Fathers Day is Still On for Me :)

It's kinda hard for me, today. Everywhere I go, there are banners saying "make your dad happy! Buy him this or that for fathers day . . . " Or "don't forget, give your dad a hug today" . . . And it's difficult not being able to celebrate having a Dad in my own life. Today is the day that makes me wonder about him. I wonder what he's doing, what's going through his mind, if he's even thinking about me. Right now he's in a world all his own . . . A world that I'm not part of, anymore. So I want to say to you girls out there reading this - Don't take it for granted that you have a Father. Treasure this day, because you have the greatest privledge in being able to celebrate it. Not all girls can.

Embrace it when he's "embarrassing old dad" . . . Actually listen, when he talks to you. As kids we sometimes think we know it all. Don't forget that a godly father holds wisdom about things you don't know yet *gasp!*

I don't and probably will never have the chance that a lot of you girls have, to be loved and cherished by my dad. Even if you don't have the best relationship with him, try to mend that today. Do it, if for no other reason, for the knowledge that not all people have what you do.

Thankfully I'm not left to stare at those banners and advertisements without any sense of love in my life. My heavenly father is more than enough :) He continues to carry me through. He has also put amazing father figures in my life, who have been there in support for my family since the beginning. My sincere and heartfelt thanks and love to Mr. Murphy, Mr. Limon, Mr. Wood, Mr. Etter, and those who have come around me to say "I'm here for you" through words and actions. I've been greatly blessed by your presence in my life. Father's day is still on, for me :)

~Lauren Lee

"See how very greatly our Father loves us, for He calls us His children, and that is what we are!" ~1 John 3:1

What's in Your Something Box?

I love airports. I really do. And I was able to spend quite a bit of time in them last week, as I was blessed to travel back east to visit friends. I get such a kick out of people in airports. They look so . . . Stressed. As I sat eating lunch, there was a woman with a fussy newborn to my left, and an old guy who looks like he’s had a vacation-gone-wrong on my right. Everyone, reguardless of who they are, seem to have problems with one thing or the other - It seemed like they were stuck.

Stuck in a box of .... something.

At my connecting flight in Houston, I had a VERY long layover. Desperately attempting to pass the time, I waddled quite naturally into a bookstore nearest my gate. I saw books on love, books on hate . . . books on yoga, books on dieting. Books on, "how to find your life calling" and "how to find the NEW you!" It seemed like everywhere I turned, were books that told people how to get out of their something box. Something being, their looks, their weight . . . . Their obnoxious boyfriends, their jealous girlfriends, their bad childhood, their rebellious children, their defective marriages. These boxes of somethings had kept these people chained to a certain problem in their life, and for some reason, they can't get out. They'll go to self-help books to try to find answers . . . But the reality is,

They're trapped.

In a box.

It's been sealed, and there's no way out.

They are literally bondservants to Satan. Jesus said in John 8:34: "Everyone who sins IS a slave to sin." They can wiggle and squirm, and try to do it themselves, but the reality is that they're stuck. Helpless to conquer their something.

It is a dire situation. Sin is not a small matter. Often times we downsize it, so that we feel better about ourselves. Oh, sin. It's just human nature, right? It doesn't seem like such a big deal. Nobody's perfect. God accepts us as we are. Yes?

No.

Sin. A three letter word.

The most powerful force existing outside of the God's love.

Really think about that for a minute.

It is deadly, and draws people in with the most deceitful and cunning tactics. It is something to be terribly feared, because it will ensnare us in a box, faster than we think - and there's absolutely no hope of us saving ourselves.

Someone else has to be our hero, our savior, our liberator.

"But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you wholeheartedly obeyed the form of teaching to which you were entrusted. You have been SET FREE from sin and have become slaves to righteousness." ~Romans 6:17-18

The freedom found in Christ enables us to reject sin, and embrace righteousness. Once He becomes Lord of our life, our something disappears.

We're free in His grace. :) Thank goodness for His love.

~Lauren Lee

"But now that you have been set free from sin and have becomes slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life."

An Afternoon With the Mad Crafters!

Yesterday was most lovely! We met with some of our dear friends to make candles . . . and had a marvelous time. I've had requests to post the pictures here on my blog, so here they are! :)

We had to start out by chopping up the cow fat. Yes. Cow fat. It was not so delightful to smell, I have to say . . . It was pretty stinky!

Aren't our Mommies beautiful? My Mom said to Mrs. Coarse as they were chopping, "girl, you handle that fat well!" I'm not sure she quite heard how wrongly that came out. ;)

Yes - Very stinky. Tiffany's face says it all!

Next, we had to put the stinkiness into these tin cans . . . and melt it. Let the candle making begin!

Lilly and Liberty. They are such dears! Look at them in those little aprons!

Thankfully, we added a vanilla scent to it once it started melting down. It was no longer stinky!! In fact, it smelled rather nice.

Thank goodness for Tinker Toys! Remember those from little kid days?? We used them to tie the candle wicks around in order that it might be easier to dip them in the wax.

Here's Lillie's wick!

Our candles each turned out very . . . uniquely. To say the least. Mica's was rather . . . . Chubby. ;)

Mrs. Limon had a brilliant idea to hang the candles on the rose bushes to dry.

Here's some pictures of the kids (and grown ups!) having some fun:

A very fun time!

Hope ya'll are having a wonderful weekend.

~Lauren Lee =)

Oh Yes . . . He Can Have "That Look", Too!

I've often (attempted to) hold a staring contest with my sister. Whoever smiles first, loses.

I always lose.

She can crack me up without even trying. It's that look. It's some mysterious little giggle-prompter she's been blessed with or something - But no matter what I do, I can't keep a straight face!

The last month has been hard. I'll be honest. Between problems with my Dad, problems with my friends, problems with a friend's family, and problems that I have yet to pinpoint . . . my life has been a whirlwind. As you could tell from a couple posts ago, quite a few emotions have been stirring about in my heart. But no matter what my mood is . . . I can sometimes see God peeping around the corner with "that" look on his face. The look that can crack you up. The look that can cheer you even when you're at the bottom.

The same look Tay gives me, that I can't stay serious with for the life of me!

God definitely has a sense of humor. :) It catches me off guard, and adds fun to my life in those times when there would be . . . none. I read a cute story on a blog the other day, here it is:

Dwight Nelson recently told a true story about the pastor of his church. He had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc., but the kitty would not come down. The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided that if he tied a rope to his car and pulled it until the tree bent down, he could then reach up and get the kitten.

And that’s what he did, all the while checking his progress in the car. He then figured if he went just a little bit further, the tree would be bent sufficiently for him to reach the kitten.

Unfortunately, as he moved the car a little further forward, the rope broke. The tree went “boing!” and the kitten instantly sailed through the air and out of sight!

The pastor felt terrible! He walked all over the neighborhood asking people if they’d seen a little kitten. Nobody had spotted the poor little guy, so the pastor prayed, “Lord, I just commit this kitten to your keeping,” and went on about his business.

A few days later he was at the grocery store, and met one of his church members. He happened to look into her shopping cart and was amazed to see cat food … the woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her, “Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats so much?”

The woman replied, “You won’t believe this,” and then told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing. Then a few days before, the child had begged again, so the woman finally told her, “Well, if God gives you a cat, I’ll let you keep it.”

She told the pastor, “I watched my child go out in the yard, get down on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won’t believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her!”

Never underestimate the power of God and His unique sense of humor!

He really does have such a fun sense of humor . . . . I see it in my own life all the time. Isn't it fun how God is interested in such little things of life?? I love how personal He is!

Who said the Christian life was boring?! It can be a real crack-up sometimes. Pay attention . . . and you just might see "that" look on God's face. :)

~Lauren Lee