Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Humbled . . . And Broken

Lord, who am I? That you care to know my name, and care to feel my hurt?
Right when it is that I think I have been bringing You the most glory, just when I think I am fulfilling my purpose as a witness to the cross . . . Just when it is, that I am so in love with You . . . My heart is broken again. Lord, please show you what you want me to do. Show me Lord, if I'm wrong.

These past couple days, I've been . . . hurt. I've been told that I'm changing for the worse by a friend of mine. Please, pray for me as I seek God's guidance on these things . . . my heart has been broken, but I know that God is using this to humble my heart. How I want to know His will! How I wish to know His purpose through this.

Although my friend feels I've not measured up . . . I know that in my heart I do so seek to live a righteous life for Gods glory. I never want my speech reflecting anything but the heart of a young lady owned by her Heavenly Father. I am not sure if I have failed here, and it is confusing. I am searching my heart, but haven't found anything yet.

However the knowledge of what my friend is thinking, is enough to make me wilt inside. I am hurt, yes, but how I want to repair things. I think it is ironic that my last post was one on failure. Here I am, and I myself have failed! Thank goodness my Father doesn't love me based on my speech, or my good deeds.

It is not by my works that Christ accepts me . . . How grateful I am for that!! Thank you, Father . . . let me live for you alone, let me conform myself to your standard alone, and discover where I've violated it. Make me holy, as you are. Please take away the hurt, Lord . . .

~Lauren Lee

I love you, O Lord, my strength! ~Psalm 18:1


Emilyann Pool said...

Dear Lauren,

I am not sure about what your friend sees, or what he/she is feeling, but let me tell you- you are an inspiration to us all. You're so strong, and so true. You know and accept that you're a sinner, and Christ is the only way. It's not an easy thing to admit- look at the faith God has given you!

I pray for you daily. You are often in my thoughts. Whenever you need me, you know I'll be there, love. :)

You're amazing, hun. Keep on plunkin'.

Emilyann :)

Anonymous said...

I just happened upon this on a blogroll, but I prayed for you just now. We're both daughters of the Most High God, and He hears our prayers.

Lauren Lee said...

You are such a blessing to me. I am SO grateful for you, my friend. =) Love you lots, honey. <3 We'll talk soon!

To my anonymous commenter . . . Thank you so much for your prayers :) They are greatly appreciated, and yes, He most certainly does!

Anonymous said...

I just found your blog on the Feelin' Feminine Blogroll... I said a prayer for you, that God will give you the truth of the situation.
Blessings to you!

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